They Just Don't Get It

This was written in 1999, right before the 2000 Census. It was first published in the webzine interracialfamily.com, and then again in the print 'zine Rag. Not sure if either still exist today!


They Just Don’t Get It


And let me preface this by saying that I am not an “Us vs. Them” type of person. Not a big fan of separation and division. I’m usually a “one love, one heart, one world,” let’s all join hands around a bigass bonfire and sing and dance to Bob Marley’s “One Love” type of a gal. I really, really am.

But they just don’t get it.

And it’s really starting to piss me off. Big time. After all, are we not smack in the middle of the first year of the first century of a NEW MILLENIUM, for goodness sake? The year 2000 is finally here, and we bi- or multi-racial folks are still forced to choose just one race on government and education forms, and most job applications too. I’ll never forget my experience in university (granted, this was about twelve or thirteen years ago, but I’m afraid not much has progressed since then) in the Financial Aid office. I filled out the required form and was handing it back to the white-haired old lady on the other side of the counter. I had created my own box, checked it, wrote “other” to the side of it, and in parentheses put “Eurasian.” She just stared blankly at me and said, “That’s not one of the choices,” to which I replied, “But that’s what I am.” Her blank stare turned into a frustrated stare, complete with pursed lips. She repeated that my ethnicity was not one of the acceptable choices, and as I felt the blood rushing to my cheeks, I angrily grabbed the form from her and crossed out what I had put, checked the “Caucasian” box, shoved the form back across the counter, and went on my way.

A little background on me: I was born in England of a white English father and a Korean mother. I had the good fortune to travel extensively during my upbringing, but was raised mostly in these United States. I’ve lived all over the States, but I have my first memories of Buffalo, NY, (brrrrr), then later Northbrook, a suburb of Chicago, then even later, during my junior high years, Missouri City, TX, a burb of Houston. I also had the wonderful opportunity to live overseas, Yokohama, Japan; Seoul, Korea; and the beautiful tropical island of Singapore.

It has been a long journey, but I have finally come to accept my dual heritage and even embrace it. In my childhood growing up in the States, I just wanted to be a normal kid and blend in, not stand out in any way. I would have been happy to just choose “Caucasian” and leave it at that. But now I feel that to do so would be to dishonor my mother, and by the same token if I were to choose only “Asian,” I would be dishonoring my father. I have a term that I’m very comfortable with, Eurasian. So why can’t the governmental and educational institutions of this country accept me and my dual ethnicity, along with the millions of others like me, and just get over what ever hang-ups they have about it and create a “Bi- or Multi-racial” category on the 2000 Census form? And all the other forms as well. I really think they have made a big mistake by choosing not to include such a category on the Census. And I think there are going to be a lot of angry and hurt people, like myself, who are forced to pigeonhole themselves or their children into one little box, when really that little box represents only half of who they are.

People have told me that one reason that the powers-that-be are so reluctant to change things is because of funding. That certain groups will give money to your organization/school/university if you have X% of Blacks, Hispanics, Native Americans, or whatever the case may be. Fine. I’m okay with that. If the Association of Really Wealthy Young Black Engineers wants to donate a huge sum of money to the Engineering department of Anywhere College, because Anywhere College just happened to give scholarships to promising young Black students from the inner city, GREAT! Let them do it. But here’s the thing. Stanley Smith (work with me here, please) just happens to be young, from the inner city, and wants to be an engineer. He is bi-racial, half black and half white. Why should he be forced to choose? IT IS UP TO HIM! And to think that he may loose out on that scholarship because he wishes to honor both his mother and his father, it boggles the mind.

So what’s the answer?

Change the forms.

Too expensive, too time consuming. Maybe. So what? This is an issue, and it’s not going to go away, and with the number of mixed-race marriages quadrupling since the 1970’s, it’s only going to get bigger and bigger. Besides, everything is done by computer these days. How difficult would it be to get a few computer programmers into the Office of the Census and add a “Bi- or Multi-racial” category under the ones that are already there? If they’re still so concerned about funding (let’s not forget Stanley) or other issues, then why don’t they give the person filling out the form a blank under the “Bi- or Multi-racial” box, and let them write in what they feel is appropriate? For example, I would check the “Bi- or Multi-racial” box and under it write in “Asian and Caucasian,” Stanley would check the same box and write in “Black and Caucasian.”

If that is what he chooses to do, if that is how he chooses to identify himself. I cannot speak for him.

Nor do I like others speaking for me.